5 Tips for Writing Middle-Grade Romance
I still remember my first kiss. I was 14, tall for my age, with crunchy-curly hair and swoopy side bangs I straightened with a flatiron. I thought about my crush constantly but was afraid to look him in the eye. When he asked me to the movies—in a text message, of course—I didn’t hesitate, even though inside, I was a jumble of nerves.
(7 Tips for Developing a Middle-Grade Fiction Premise.)
At the theater, between fleeting glances, we talked about school and friends, and never, ever our feelings for each other. Then the lights went down. The movie began, and his hand found mine in the dark. Minutes passed like hours, and all I could think about was my hand in his. My hand in his! My hand—oh no, was it getting sweaty?—in his. About halfway through the movie, he said my name. I turned to find his eyes closing, and his body leaning in. My heart leapt—this was it! I didn’t think, or even breathe. I just closed my eyes and pressed my lips to his.
Looking back, everything about that kiss and its circumstances makes me laugh. It was about a microsecond long, during a screening of The Blind Side, and neither one of us spoke of it after. But in the moment—and later, when I told my best friends—it was the most romantic thing that could have possibly happened to me. This is the crux of tween romance: It’s earth-shattering and embarrassing at the same time.
I tell my story to illustrate a fundamental truth: It’s impossible to write middle-grade romance without all the humor, angst, and awkwardness of middle-grade life. When you’re 14 (or 13, or 12), fairy-tale romance is almost always thwarted by reality, which is in a near-constant state of overwhelming transition. You’re crossing that threshold from childhood to adolescence, grappling with where you fit in, how to style your hair, first crushes, first kisses, first everything. It’s confusing. And exciting. And everything in between.
Here are five tips to help you capture it all.
Voice Is the Foundation
From new friends to first crushes and changing bodies, there’s so much self-discovery happening in middle-grade, and your main character’s voice should reflect that. Their voice should always reflect what they’re struggling with internally, because their worries shape the way they see the world.
No matter what specific issues your character might be dealing with, some aspects of being a tween are just universal. Everything is new, everything is a big deal, and everyone is at least a little bit insecure, especially when it comes to matters of the heart.
So let your character over-analyze every glance from their crush. Let them agonize over the meaning behind that “like” on social media. Let them second-guess themselves. When it comes to middle-grade romance, there’s very little room for certainty. Feelings, like everything else when you’re 13, can change in an instant.
Everything Is Awkward
Seriously, everything, but especially romance. In middle-grade, there’s nothing more embarrassing than admitting your true feelings to your crush–except maybe holding their hand in front of your friends, as in my novel All My Bests.
Whether you’re writing dialogue, choosing an outfit for your character, or fleshing out a scene, don’t be afraid to lean into the awkwardness of adolescence. More importantly, don’t be afraid to find humor in it.
For example: Maybe your character wants to look extra nice at the football game because her crush will be there, so she borrows her mom’s makeup for the occasion. Unfortunately, she uses way too much blush, and when she gets to the game, her crush asks if she’s okay, because her face is really red. Awkward!
When It Comes to PDA, Less Is More
This one is a no-brainer, but it bears repeating. Physical romance should always serve the story, and in middle-grade, any displays of affection should be as awkward and fumbling as the inexperienced tween carrying them out.
What will make that first kiss really jump off the page is not the kiss itself–the kiss will almost always be lackluster–but the moments of tension and pining that propel the reader to that moment. Which brings me to my next point:
Amp Up the Angst
Tweens and teens are full of angst and conflicting emotions. It’s what makes them so fun to write about! But how do you portray angst on the page? With tension.
To work realistic moments of tension into your middle-grade romance, ask yourself: How can I make things even worse for my character? Consider issues that are specific to the tween dating experience. Make your character send a text to the wrong person, or get caught passing notes in class, or even put them in a love triangle. Sprinkle in moments of miscommunication that make them question what they know to be true.
In All My Bests, my characters are constantly sabotaging their own happiness because they’re keeping secrets and overthinking everything. Needless to say, their romance is riddled with angst.
Find Magic in the Mundane
Most of the time, tweens aren’t going out and having fancy dates or grand adventures. They’re in their bedroom, or at school, or maybe at the movies, but that doesn’t mean their stories can’t still be exciting.
Unexpected moments can happen anywhere. Their crush might ask them out by their locker. They might have a life-changing date just walking around at the mall. It’s not where they are that matters—it’s what they do while they are there.
Check out Britnee Meiser’s All My Bests here:
(WD uses affiliate links)