Putting the ‘Com’ in ‘Rom-Com’
When you think of a rom-com, what’s the first thing that pops into your head? Is it Meg Ryan and Tom Hanks meeting at the top of the Empire State Building? John Cusack holding a boombox over his head? What about Steve Carell screaming “Kelly Clarkson!” as he gets his chest waxed in The 40-Year-Old Virgin?
A rom-com, as the title implies, contains moments of romance and comedy. And while both elements present their own unique challenges, I’d wager that pulling off the comedic bits can often feel like the more intimidating of the two.
Years ago I took a writing workshop with a friend who swore she wasn’t funny. “It doesn’t come naturally to me!” she’d exclaim, insisting humor wasn’t a teachable skill. But sure enough, when other members in our group read her work, they always laughed. I don’t think this was a case of false modesty. Rather, what my friend probably didn’t understand is that you don’t have to be a comedian to write a funny scene.
Jane Austen—arguably the master of romantic comedies—ended many of her novels with a wedding or heartfelt proposal. Yet in real life, she was never herself married. Her books were also classified as comedies of manners. Does this mean she was trudging over to Ye Old Comedy Pub every Friday night, putting her name in the open mic bucket to do a 10-minute set on the shortcomings of the British Empire and men’s dating habits in Georgian society? I doubt it. (If this did indeed happen, history is worse off for having lost all record of it.)
Thankfully, writing comedy on the page is more than just coming up with a good punchline. There are plenty of tricks and tools a writer can use to hone their natural comedic talents—whether they think they’re funny or not.
Know Your Comedic Tone
Let’s start with the most important rule of comedy: Humor is subjective. You’re never going to make every reader laugh. Believe it or not, this is a good thing. You can free yourself from the burden of trying to appeal to everyone. Besides, if you attempted to squeeze every style of comedy into your book—highbrow, lowbrow, parody, irony, slapstick—it’d be a tonal mess.
If you’re unsure what your comedic tone is, think about what makes you laugh. Do you like humor that’s dry and witty? A little over the top and absurd? Perhaps you find it impossible to pass up a good pun. Obviously, some types of humor work better in a romantic comedy than others. It’s not a hard and fast rule, but most readers are going to expect something on the lighter side. Which isn’t to say darker humor can’t be done. Jesse Q. Sutanto’s Dial A for Aunties begins with the romantic heroine accidently murdering her blind date.
Dead bodies or not, once you know what your comedic strengths are, focus on sharpening them. Reading your work out loud can help. And if you’re really brave, you can try reading it in front of other people. More often than not, people will laugh in unexpected places. Pay attention, and try to decipher later why those moments worked.
Know Your Genre (And Its Tropes)
Defining what a rom-com is—and isn’t—tends to be a hot topic that’s always up for debate. For my personal definition, a rom-com needs three things to work: romance, comedy, and conflict. There are, however, two asterisks attached to that last one.
The first asterisk is that your conflict needs to be the driving force behind a romantic relationship that’s the central plot of the story. Readers pick up a rom-com to see how two (or more!) people will end up together. If your heroine is vacationing in a creepy old mansion where dead bodies start piling up, and she needs to figure out how to get out alive so she can start dating the woman of her dreams she just met, you’ve written a murder mystery with a romantic subplot. If your heroine is vacationing in a creepy old manor and she needs to figure out how to win over the woman of her dreams she just met … while also not getting murdered, you’ve written a rom-com with a murder mystery subplot.
Is there some wiggle room here? Yes. Once you know the rules, it’s OK to bend them a bit.
The second asterisk is that your conflict needs to include moments of comedic tension. The tension in a rom-com can be sexy. It can be steamy. But if it isn’t also funny at times, then you’ve just written a regular romance. Thankfully, this is where the tropes come in.
A romantic trope is a theme, character, or plot device that’s been used so often it’s become conventional (and therefore easily recognizable) in the genre. The reasons tropes are used over and over again is because they work. Friends-to-lovers. Opposites attract. Forced proximity. There’s natural conflict baked into these situations already. And in a rom-com, this is where you start mining for comedic gold.
“Wacky hijinks” may not be the most scholarly term, but it’s part of the magic alchemy that occurs when using tropes. The First Son of the United States is forced into a fake friendship with his nemesis, the Prince of Wales … and wacky hijinks ensue. (Casey McQuiston’s Red, White & Royal Blue.) A publishing assistant looking to move ahead tracks down a recluse author to obtain his long overdue manuscript … and wacky hijinks ensue. (Jasmine Guillory’s By the Book.)
Let’s revisit our heroine at the creepy old mansion. What if she has to share a room with the woman of her dreams for the night … and there’s only one bed? What could possibly go wrong? Hopefully everything. Which brings us to our next point.
“Thankfully, writing comedy on the page is more than just coming up with a good punchline. There are plenty of tricks and tools a writer can use to hone their natural comedic talents—whether they think they’re funny or not.” —Brian D. Kennedy
Writer’s Digest
Pain is Funny (Especially When It’s Not Your Own)
As comedy legend Mel Brooks once observed: “Tragedy is when I cut my finger. Comedy is when you walk into an open sewer and die.” Other people’s misfortune can be funny—precisely because it didn’t happen to us. So don’t be afraid to make your characters squirm.
One area where a little catastrophe lends itself well is the meet-cute trope. Can your two leads bump into each other on crowded subway car and have it set off a chain of romantic events that sustains an entire novel? Sure. But is it memorable? Is it funny? What if one of the leads was just laid off from her job, and her dress gets stuck in the train door, ripping the back half open? (An unfortunate fate bestowed upon the heroine in Kate Spencer’s In a New York Minute.) Not only does this put the character in a vulnerable position, therefore upping the dramatic tension and stakes, but it allows us to sympathize with her as well. Maybe we haven’t accidently mooned anyone on public transportation, but we’ve probably all had moments of being equally embarrassed or mortified. When we laugh at something like this, it’s not because we’re being mean. It’s because we understand the feeling, and we’re relived not to be the one experiencing it firsthand this time.
That being said, a little bit of cringe goes a long way. Don’t be too cruel to your characters. Stories need peaks and valleys. Nobody wants to read 300 pages of suffering, so give your characters plenty of triumphs as well.
That’s What He / She / They Said
Good banter is one of the backbones of romantic comedies. Readers expect their romantic leads to be able to exchange snappy one-liners and clever retorts at a pace that’s rarely matched in real life. On the page, this should feel effortless. Learning how to pull this off effectively, however, may take a little work.
If you have a good sense of comedic timing, you already have a bit of an advantage. If you’re unsure of your comedic timing or worry it’s not a strength—don’t. This just means you get to do research. And by research, I mean reading and watching as many rom-coms as you want. If you immerse yourself in the genre and pay attention to the dialogue, you’ll start to develop an ear for the rhythms and cadences that make a scene snap. (Hint: more concise is usually better.)
Of course, how the characters are behaving is just as important as what they’re saying—another reason why writing a rom-com is more than just coming up with punchlines and jokes. As a general rule, you never want to let your characters get too mean. Banter is supposed to be fun and flirty. Think good-hearted teasing, not cold-blooded torture. While their words can still have bite to them, body language, action, or internal dialogue can help convey the true playfulness of the situation.
Let’s take a look a scene that could be in a novel, and definitely not a conversation my husband and I might’ve had when he caught me reading a book instead of working this article:
“I thought you were writing.”
“I told you. Half of writing is reading.”
“What’s the other half? Scrolling through Instagram?”
“Procrastination is part of my process. I work better under pressure.”
“In that case, why don’t you procrastinate by making us dinner?”
“And risk burning or cutting one of my precious typing fingers?”
These lines being delivered with an exasperated huff will hit differently than if they’re said with an arched eyebrow or playful smirk. If my husband rolls his eyes at me, maybe he also has to bite back a smile. Even in an enemies-to-lovers story—where a little spite is welcomed—we still need to root for your characters. Perhaps their meanness is covering up a vulnerability, or a secret passion for their sworn enemy that our hero is unable to process yet. Too much animosity will sour your readers on your characters and the supposed love story you’re trying to convey.
The Rule of Three
The rule of three is a storytelling principle that suggests a collection of things—words, ideas, sentences—are more effective and memorable when grouped together in threes. Goldilocks tried three different porridges and beds. The Big Bad Wolf chased after three little pigs. Stories all have beginnings, middles, and ends. The human brain latches onto something it recognizes—a pattern—and uses that to process the information it’s being given.
In comedy, the rule of three can be manipulated in a way that will almost always ensure you a laugh. Once the pattern is established with your first two things, the third can be subverted, therefore catching your audience by surprise. That’s part of the reason the waxing scene in The 40-Year-Old Virgin works so well. When Steve Carell gets his chest hair ripped out, he unleashes a string of expletives—humorous enough in itself. If that’s all there were to the scene, we might stop laughing after the first few times. But just as we think we know the pattern he screams out Kelly Clarkson’s name. It’s totally unexpected, giving us something new to laugh about.
Let’s come up with our own example. Perhaps we have a romantic protagonist who’s anxious about their first date. While sitting in the restaurant parking lot, the following monologue plays in their head as they consider whether or not to go through with it:
What if we have nothing in common? What if I get food stuck in my teeth? What if I develop a sudden shellfish allergy, my date falls in love with the cute EMT, and two years from now, when they feel obligated to invite me to their wedding, I find myself spending hundreds of dollars on a rice cooker for someone I never even made it to the dessert course with?
Not only does the third sentence heighten their anxiety to an absurd level we don’t expect, but it breaks the shorter pattern of the first two sentences.
*****
Writing comedy doesn’t have to be intimidating. Find what tips, tricks, and tropes work best for you—and have fun with it. Don’t worry too much about being funny. Your readers are usually the ones who will decide that for you.
Do you yearn to write a romantic story? If so, you need to know what sets romance writing apart from other types of fiction. This course explores why romance is the same, yet different. Some essential components of romance are unique to the genre, while some romance requirements are identical to those of any good fiction story.
Writer’s Digest University