Writing Sibling Rivalry for Middle-Grade Readers
In my newest book, The Second Favorite Daughter’s Club, there is a scene where one, treasured and very annoying daughter tackles her rash and jealous younger sister in the middle of a ballet recital. They roll on the floor, yelling at each other as the audience gasps, but we—the reader—saw this moment building through the entire book. Now that it’s here, this comedic moment should come as a relief—a climactic scene that is earned for our main character.
(7 Tips for Developing a Compelling Middle-Grade Fiction Premise.)
For The Second Favorite Daughter’s Club, I wanted to take a deep and reflective look at the family dynamics that drive the idea of the “favorite child.” While most parents would quickly deny that they have a favorite child, the actual reality is that in most families there is a favorite child. Parents may say they love all their children the same, but there’s definitely a child that the parent likes hanging out with the most.
In the book, our two protagonists, Casey and Santana, are second favorite daughters in very different families who connect to form the club. Santana is the younger sister of Victoria—the embodiment of the perfect older sister—a ballet protégé and sucker of all her parent’s admiration. Her sister is selfish, gifted, and sometimes cruel. Bumbling, funny, and likable Santana’s life consists of attending Victoria’s endless parade of recitals, forced to watch everyone fall over themselves for her sister’s beauty and talent.
Casey, on the other hand, is the older sister of Sage, a wild and feisty, adorable young child who reminds their single father of himself. Casey’s father has a special, hippie-ish vibe with Sage that stands in contrast to Casey’s careful, bookish nature. They struggle to connect in the face of this dynamic; when one sibling is clearly a mirror of the parent, how does the other child stand out?
Within these dynamics, I had two different avenues to explore as I wrote the book; both girls are second favorite daughters, but within different birth orders. One a younger child, one an older, favorites for opposite reasons. The lesson? A second favorite child can come from anywhere.
When Casey and Santana meet at school, they instantly find connection and form The Second Favorite Daughters Club. Its purpose? To undermine their perfect siblings, steal their parent’s affection and become the first favorite daughters. Does it work? Only the reader will find out.
Check out Colleen Oakes’ The Second Favorite Daughters Club here:
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Writing this kind of sibling dynamics required a careful and close look at what makes sisters tick; the way they fight, communicate, love, and tolerate each other. I am the oldest of two children, and my sister is absolutely the favorite child. My mother worries about her constantly, dotes on her, and can’t live without their daily chats. My late father had a chill relationship with my sister that seemed idyllic to me from the outside; my relationship with him was much more complicated (though full of love).
I grew up knowing that I wasn’t the favorite child, and it wasn’t until I spoke the words out loud to my coworker Santana that I felt a freedom in them. We were speaking about what it was like to be a second favorite child, and suddenly, the idea was born. This, I thought, was a fantastic idea for a middle-grade book! Likewise, when Casey and Santana speak these words out loud in the book, it likewise gives them power. By acknowledging that they aren’t the favorite child, they can attempt to do something about it.
As Casey and Santana move forward with the club and its nefarious goals, I was careful to make sure that all of this was bathed in love; both girls love their siblings and would never want them physically hurt. The pranks cannot ever forever traumatize the siblings, which would thus lose the empathy that our two main characters need to possess for the entirety of the novel.
Especially for Casey—who is the older sibling to a very young Sage—I had to be careful that this didn’t look like bullying. Instead, these pranks were designed to make middle-grade readers laugh—and to knock these siblings down a peg, while still simultaneously opening the doors for them to reconnect. Victoria is a much more formidable enemy who doesn’t mind some manipulations of her own.
When writing these sibling dynamics, it was important to not only maintain the existing relationships and bonds, but to further and expand a path to deeper connection. Even if that includes throwing cupcakes, slime on tutus, and killing your father’s favorite plants. These guidelines also served to connect the two main characters, as the themes of friendship emerge throughout the book.
Hopefully readers will find themselves in a tale of friends who become like family, and the coming of age event that is finding your people. The message of the book is that all siblings are worthy of love and respect—and that being the favorite might not always be all that it seems.
If you are a second favorite child, know there is hope for you—and it may just come in the form of a middle-grade book. Welcome to the club.
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